Would you like me to come to your organization or event for a live consent workshop? Would you like me to speak at your event? There are a wide variety of topics I can speak on from kink and BDSM to intersectionality to advanced consent topics.
Consent: The Five Pillars Upon Which to Build a Consent Culture 60 to 90 min.
This presentation is presented in lecture format with invited participation from attendees. The discussion includes a codified, simplistic way of establishing consent in every human interaction as well as concrete methods by which to simplify the consent conversation. The lecturer proposes a seismic paradigm shift in the way consent is thought of, obtained and discussed. Concepts are presented in a well thought, well researched, straightforward and conversational plain language and entertaining format. Audiences will be encouraged to participate in the discussion and to ask questions. These practical principles are intended to be integrated into everyday life and used daily. The discussion is pansexual, poly friendly and will support, pertain to, and affirm all sexual orientations, gender identities or forms of sexual or relationship expression. Topics include: The purpose of the consent conversation, The role consent plays in human interaction, The five pillars of consent with examples and explanations, A completely different way of thinking about consent, Strategies to minimize misunderstandings, Ways to begin building a consent culture, Socialization of the word “no,” Toxic Politeness.
Radical Self(ish) Love: How Loving Yourself is the Best Thing You Can Do for All of Your Relationships. 75 min.
This presentation is presented in lecture format with invited participation from attendees. Building on the “Five Pillars of Consent” model, the presenter will discuss the basics of self care. But will also explore the reasons why self care is often and intentionally overlooked in today’s society. Included will be discussions about how self-care is neither an indulgence, nor an option. The presenter will give examples and reasons why self care is CRITICAL and even ETHICAL to maintaining healthy relationships, particularly in non-monogamous/polyamorous dynamics. The discussion will propose a radical shift in the way self care is viewed as well as pointing out the “backwards and upside down” prevailing narrative of self care. Key points in this presentation include the “myth of selflessness”, “everyone has the same primary”,”turning the ‘To Do List’ upside down”, “self care red flags when going into new relationships”, “being selfish together”, and the “absolute, unequivocal imperative obligation to be shamelessly selfish.”
Superminority: Seeing, Honoring and Loving the Polyamorous Black Male. 75 min.
Non monogamy is nothing new to Black men in America. Ethical non monogamy, however, is a relatively new concept. This lecture format discussion will explore some of the reasons why Black males are among the most underrepresented demographic in ethically non monogamous spaces. The presenter will draw from historical understandings, some research, and his own personal experiences as a Black American man who identifies as polyamorous to share the story of “where we came from and how we got here.” This deeply personal discussion will attempt to shed some light on the reality of being Black and Polyamorous. It will also give insights into ways to having the difficult conversations around race and where they intersect with relationships and polyamory. Also included will be some suggested ways of being a supportive partner to a Black, polyamorous individual. This workshop would be of benefit to anyone who wants to understand the uniqueness of the Black and Poly experience. It will also benefit those who are currently in, or may find themselves in, relationships or polycules with a Black man. As always, the curious and genuinely interested are always welcome. Some highlights are, “hypermasculinity in the Black community”, “fetishization”, “tokenism or ambassadorship”, “the curious case of Black non monogamy” and “for the love of God if you are ‘colorblind’ I have no use for you.